May 6, 2012
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Dream
Last night, as I was falling asleep, I had a great idea for the blog. It was a great topic, and I even came up with a catchy title for the entry. (I’ll wait while you glance up above to re-read the title, since you’re thinking, “Huh, I don’t remember an eye grabbing title.”)
I can’t remember anything about the topic or the title. Nothing.
So instead, let me regale you with a bit of a dream I had this morning. I know it was morning, because our daughter came in to wake me up just as I was getting to a crucial part of the dream. But I’m getting ahead of myself.
My dreams are usually long, meandering epics that are never scary, sometimes funny, and often quite bizarre. I recently mentioned in a comment on my friend @ordinarybutloud ‘s site that I even tend to retell myself the dream before I wake up, in an effort to force my subconscious to remember it after I’ve awakened. While this is an impressive bit of overachievement by my subconscious, alas, it rarely works.
The first part of this particular dream that I remember involves me walking down the street. It was a leisurely stroll, and then I guess I decided to spice it up by levitating a few feet above the ground. Just my luck, as soon as I decided to levitate, the small green dinosaur that was walking by on the other side of the street decided to turn back and confront me. I was calm, because I had encountered this type of dinosaur in the neighborhood before, and they were usually friendly.
Luckily, I was of sound enough mind to realize that the increasingly agitated and aggressive dinosaur was only upset because I was levitating. So I simply returned to the ground, and the dinosaur not only retreated, but tucked his tail between his legs and turned his eyes to the side while bowing his head in submission to the non-levitating human.
When I got back to my house, I decided to sit in a mostly realistic version of our family room and watch “The Price is Right,” a show I never watch in reality and find to be as annoying as fingernails on a chalkboard. But on this dreamy occasion, it was my post-levitating walk entertainment of choice.
As soon as I settled in for some quality time with the show (not sure if it was hosted by Bob Barker or Drew Carey), I was interrupted by someone making noise in our sunroom. Just as I looked up, two teenagers began to unlock the sliding glass door leading to the family room (a door that does not exist in reality), and I started saying, “Uh, excuse me! I’m here you know!”
I got up and walked into the sunroom, which was suddenly filled with a large group of kids who were all drunk and acting rowdy. I walked out on the much-bigger-than-in-reality deck, and found a few stragglers who were not just drunk, but also smoking cigarettes.
I demanded that they all come into my house. It was a bit like herding cats, but I eventually got them all in and locked them in somehow. Oh, and also one of the ladies from the PTA Executive Committee, who just happened to be working at a laptop in my yard and got scared when I started yelling about how everyone needed to come inside “right this minute”!
Once they were inside, I asked the kids how old they were. As they were pacing drunkenly around my house, I said, “You’re in 6th grade, aren’t you?” They had looked older on the porch, but looked much younger and more innocent once inside. One of the girls nodded in agreement — 6th graders.
I was about to do something about all this drunken breaking in at my house. But then, I heard, “Mommy? Mommy? Can you come downstairs now?”
I was awakened by our daughter.
Was I going to call the cops? Or call their parents? Was the dinosaur going to return? Would I have levitated some more? And where did the PTA lady go? Was she upstairs snooping in my messy closets?
What would you do if you found a group of drunken kids who morphed from teenagers into middle schoolers breaking into your house while you were watching a lame game show?
Comments (6)
what…would…I do….huh. No idea. Good question.
Price Is Right *is* annoying, but sometimes after a levitating walk it is exactly what I need to unwind.
No idea what to do with drunk middle schoolers. Especially morphed ones.
I would probably yell at them. I am pretty good at yelling at kids once I get going. I try not to do it very often, but it’s a handy skill to keep in your back pocket.
I always loved the Price Is Right. It was a summer ritual – wake up, wander into the living room and watch the Price Is Right. I think Gramma got us into it – she also always watched her “soaps”, but that viewing stayed pretty much at her house. My sister watched Days for years and would keep me up with the main story line – 10 minutes of exposition from her was FAR more satisfying than the 2 years it would take for it to happen, show-wise. I have never seen The Price Is Right with Drew Carey, though, so I suppose that tells you how long it’s been since I’ve seen it.
I am impressed you remember your dreams! I don’t really, normally. Have a wonderful day, you and your agitated dinosaur!
@ordinarybutloud - Throughout the morning, I couldn’t get the dream out of my head and kept thinking, what would I have done if I caught middle schoolers drinking at my house? Would I have called the cops or called their parents? I think in the dream I was about to call the police, but my waking self had more sympathy for the kids and their parents and thought I should just let them deal with their own kids. Thankfully, I have since moved on.
@madhousewife - Exactly!
@miss_order - Oh yeah, I’m a yeller, too. I saw Drew Carey hosting when I went to get a pedicure before my big b’day party this year. The man who was doing my nails doesn’t like The 11:00 hour of “Today” with Kathie Lee and Hoda Kotb (and neither do I – I’d rather poke my eyes out) or “The View” (which I don’t mind at all), so he switched the channel to “Price is Right.” I did not enjoy it, but apparently in my dreams – I do.
But what does it all mean??? lol i think if that happened in my dream I’dtry to change it to somthing better… maybe have them all start the electric slide? lol Seriously, I never remember my dreams lately, not enough sleep maybe? Any way, sweet dreams to you!
@angi1972 - Electric slide is brilliant! And totally believable given my usual brand of dreams. I’ll have to remember that if the kids ever break in again.